The Joys of First Grade

I was reading a book to the first graders the other day when I had to use all of my willpower to not just completely bust a gut laughing, yet at the same time cry my eyes out (not from laughing). We're reading a book about this duck on a farm that has to do all the work while the farmer just sits in bed eating candy, reading the newspaper, and growing fatter every day. When we read that part and showed the picture one of the first graders jumps up and points to the picture, "Mi papi es asi!" (My dad is just like that!). Of course Diana (who I work with in the library) is just sitting behind all the kids chuckling to herself...I was stuck in front of all of them trying to keep reading while trying to give the kid this look like, "it's not appropriate to say things like that inside the library."
That was about a week ago, then just yesterday the same class was in the library and I was reading a book called "Abuela" about a grandma who takes her granddaughter to the park. From the park they start to fly and they fly all over the city. At the start I ask the kids, "Do you have any grandmas?" The kids all start shouting and yelling, "Yo tengo uno! (I have one!)" or "Yo tengo dos! (I have two!)" or "Yo tambien! (me too!)"...and then the same kid pipes right up, "Yo tengo doce! (I have twelve!)" I tell you, this kid cracks me up....when we get done reading the story he kicks another kid in the class so I pull him aside to talk with him. I tell him that here at school we don't hit other people, we have to use our words. If somebody is bothering you move away from them, etc...but here at school we never hit anybody. his immediate response was, "Y si estoy lejos de aqui? (and if I'm far away from here?)" Good question I suppose....I told him that even there it was not nice to hit people, but he should talk to his parents about their rules at home. Speaking of children who could be their own blog with their crazy stories and actions....this first grader might be top of the list!:)